Memoir as Kuleana

by Brooke Warner

Thanks for being an early member of Memoir Nation. We’re coming into June and our more official launch this week, and we’ll be in touch about how to access the classes that come with your membership. We’re looking forward, too, to starting our accountability group next week, which is available to those of you on Paths #3 and #4.

Since we’re still very new, I wanted to take a moment to share about the reasons people write memoir in the first place. The reasons I’ve heard over the years include:

• To make a difference
• To help others
• To make sense of your story
• To set the record straight/claim your truth
• To write the book you wish you’d had when going through something difficult

Few people do it for fame and money. I see in memoirists a higher calling. The commitment to sit down and do the work—despite the challenges, in face of the very real difficulties involved in stirring up the past—is profound. Yet, countless writers are doing it, day after day, month after month.

Likely you’ve joined Memoir Nation because you have a story to tell. Maybe more than one. You might have been drawn by the prospect of like-minded people, or just the support you’re hoping to find to get yourself over the finish line. We’re here for all of that and more.

I just finished reading a book called Kuleana: A Story of Family, Land, and Legacy in Old Hawaiʻi, by my dear friend Sara Kehaulani Goo, who we’ll be bringing onto Memoir Nation in June. Kuleana means responsibility, but not the burdensome kind; it’s instead the responsibility that comes with purpose—the responsibility to write a book to help others; the responsibility to break the chain of family secrets; the responsibility to destigmatize something like abuse or mental illness; the responsibility to bring to light something that’s been hidden or buried for too long.

I love the notion that the memoirs we write are our kuleana. This purpose/responsibility/privilege is something we carry in us. It’s a torch that lights the way. Sometimes we fall into negative self-talk with our books, I know. We lay our writing down for so many reasons—fear of hurting others; time constraints; crises of confidence; and more. But if you keep coming back to your writing despite all the reasons to stop, that’s because of your kuleana. You are writing something you know you must write. I often employ the double negative when I talk about memoirists I know who can’t not do it. Perhaps you feel this way too.

Your why is likely very deep, very personal, and layered with meaning. This is your kuleana—something that pulls you and compels you forward. As you continue on this journey with us, we’ll walk alongside you, join you, remind you, nudge you, celebrate you, and show up for you.

Thanks again for showing up for us. We’re just getting started!